Michele Bachmann is a Froot Loop Looney Toon

I’ve done a good job lately of ignoring Sarah Palin, in part because a new oblivious, insane Tea Party tool of Americans for Prosperity has come on the scene. Her name is Michele Bachmann, and she’s fascinating. Positively crazy.

The Positive

First, I need to give the devil her due. She and her husband have been foster parents to 23 children. I will assume they were kind parents, although maybe they taught those kids some weird things. Whatever; that’s a noble thing to do. Lots of kids need loving homes, so I recognize her good work there.

She once opposed a “School to Work” program because it treated kids like “trainees“. I’m also opposed to the business model of education. She and I probably oppose this sort of thing for very different reasons, but strange bedfellows and all that.

She opposed the 2007 surge in Iraq. (That surge may have resulted in fewer deaths in Iraq, but I was opposed to it too.) And she opposed the Wall Street bailout. Again: different reasons, I’m sure, but I’ll give it up whenever the venn diagram overlaps.

Teh Crazy

Okay, let’s get to the fun stuff. In case you haven’t been paying attention:

  • Despite her constant complaining about government programs, her family farm received over $250,000 in 10 years.
  • In 1991 she fought against giving money to a local hospital for a morgue, because they perform abortions.
  • She helped open a charter school in 1993 that taught creationism and banned the movie Aladdin because it supposedly teaches paganism.
  • She has worked for years to create a constitutional amendment making same-sex marriage illegal. Lots of other people endorse this too, but that doesn’t make it any less insane.
  • She voted against a bill in 2007 that increased Pell Grants and lowered student loan interest rates.
  • She introduced the Light Bulb Freedom of Choice Act. I swear to Jebus I’m not making this up.
  • She has called for oil drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge. Again, she’s not alone, but it’s still crazy. Same with intelligent design and evolution as “unproven theory”.
  • She believe global warming is “voodoo, nonsense, hokum, a hoax”.
  • She calls carbon dioxide “a harmless gas”. To be fair, in small enough amounts, the same can be said of Zyklon B.
  • She insisted that media outlets try to find members of Congress who are “anti-American”. (This helped convince Colin Powell to vote Democrat in 2008.)
  • She soon took back that statement, and then immediately accused Obama of endorsing socialism.
  • She refused to take part in the 2010 census.”I know for my family the only question we will be answering is how many people are in our home,” she said. “We won’t be answering any information beyond that, because the Constitution doesn’t require any information beyond that.”
  • She said of her opposition to cap-and-trade policies: “I want people in Minnesota armed and dangerous on this issue”.
  • She opposes AmeriCorps because she believes it will lead to “re-education camps for young people, where young people have to go and get trained in a philosophy that the government puts forward and then they have to go to work in some of these politically correct forums”.
  • Her son, meanwhile, volunteered for Teach for America (an AmeriCorps program).
  • She made up crazy numbers about Obama’s 2010 trip to Asia.
  • She considers “ObamaCare” and the Dodd-Frank financial reform law extreme far-left bills, despite the fact that both of them are just tiny little baby steps in the right direction.
  • She said Republican Governor Tim Pawlenty’s tax-free zones were based on Marxist principles.
  • She wants to abolish Social Security and Medicare.
  • She’s a big fan of You Can Run But You Cannot Hide Ministry.

And then there’s the following seventeen-second YouTube video. Maybe she didn’t put it up herself, but I expect she authorized it. (“People won’t sit still for a three-minute discussion of the issue. Just put up seventeen seconds’ worth. It’s like the Twitter of YouTube.”)

TimeWaster™

Today I’m listening to: Groove Salad! Donate!