We're back! Woo! Like a stupid moron, I forgot to take any photos until we got to Pensacola -- so we only have pictures from there. But boy do we have a story!

Two Days in Lovely Paducah, KY

Shortly before 6:00 PM on Saturday, 15 July, my car made a loud boom sound and began to growl loudly. We were on I-24, just outside of Vienna, IL. We drove into a gas station and they called for us a tow-truck operator named Victor. He said he'd be right out but that nothing of course would be open until Monday morning.

Victor loaded my car onto his truck and -- since probably no one in Vienna could fix the car on Monday morning -- told us he'd take us thirty minutes ahead, just over the state line, to Paducah, Kentucky (whose website has a funky little Flash intro worth watching). As we drove, I mentioned (what desperation we find in small talk) that Vienna seemed like a nice place.

Victor shook his head. "Pretty country," he said, "but not a nice place."

"Why not?" asked I.

"Politics," he said, and that was the end of that. As we neared Paducah, he insisted that we go downtown, since the city offers a variety of live music offerings, and that it was totally safe because "there are cops all around." He also warned, however, that we should stay away from two certain streets, since that's where the drug dealers are and "they will shoot you. Because you are white." (TPCQ: "Thanks, racist bible!")

We didn't go downtown that night, but the next day we went to the Museum of the American Quilt Society, which has some very interesting quilts, and intriguing info on how they're made. We also went to Paducah's comic book shop (four guys sitting around playing Magic), and ate lunch at a spot called Jeremiah's (which featured a very friendly waiter and -- oddly enough -- frogs' legs on the menu).

On Monday morning, we called the place to which Victor had towed our car, a place called CarNeeds. Victor has assured us they could fix whatever was wrong. The man at CarNeeds came and got the keys, then called to tell us they couldn't fix it. We had to take it to a place which specialized in exhaust systems. He told me there were two places in Paducah -- Midas&trade and Fred's Muffler Shop. (I forget the real name.) He said they do business with Fred's, but not with Midas&trade.

"Why not?" I asked. He paused.

"I'm not at liberty to say," he explained. So I called Fred's. He said he could fix it, but probably needed another day to get the parts. I called Midas™. They said they'd go get it from CarNeeds and fix it that afternoon. The woman even came to get us from the Motel 6 where we'd been staying, and let us eat our lunch in her office.

As we waited for them to finish, a man who worked there asked the group who was waiting: "Who had the run-in with Victor?" I indicated I was, and he laughed. "He's my neighbor," he said, and then added ominously: "He does things differently."

We escaped from the land of the vague at 3:00 PM on Monday, and drove straight through to Gainesville, arriving at 4:00 AM local time.

Home

Gainesville was, of course, lovely, insofar as I got to spend time with my moms, my bro Mark, and my friends Megan and Kik (and their awesome kids Lan and Laura). We also hung out with Jenny & Joe and Chad and Candi at the bar where Mark is a local celeb, having drunk 100 beers in one year. Because a friend of mine from Fort Clarke Middle School owns the bar, I scored a free beer. Since I hate beer, however, I gave it to Diane, who drank 1/3 or so and passed it off to Mark. We left, but I presume he drank the rest.

We also drove down to Orlando to meet a couple of folks I met online by playing the Star Wars Battlefront II game. They were very cool and although I didn't get to meet their daughter (who also plays online), they treated us to a delicious fondue dinner and we drove back full and happy.

Pensacola

On Saturday, we drove up and over to Pensacola, where we spent a few days with Christie, Garrett, Abby and Max. We had loads of fun, seeing sights (I had been to Pensacola only once, long ago, and for only a day), eating ice cream, playing games, and beachin' it. You can see photographic evidence of all these good times at my Pensacola 2006 Flickr set. Yes, I finally got set up with the Flickr fun foto family. Much easier than my previous methods.

Thanks to Garrett for all the discs, especially the Ricky Gervais shows. chimpanzeeMONKEY NEWS!

Gone in 18 Hours

We planned to make it back over two days, but as we passed Paducah again (it's almost exactly halfway between Pensacola and Madison), we decided to keep going and see what happened. By 8 pm I knew I didn't want to stop, so we pushed ahead -- and pulled into Madtown at 2:00 AM. I tried sleeping for an hour, but then for some reason I woke up and couldn't get back to sleep. So I went to IHOP, ate some potato pancakes, and went grocery shopping at Woodman's and relaxed all day yesterday. We watched The Empire Strikes Back (I've been way into Star Wars stuff lately, including comic books and novels, and watching all the movies) and The Daily Show and Colbert and went to sleep.

Then today I woke up, unpacked, did the dishes, and blogged. Thanks to everyone who made this awesome trip so much fun, and hopefully we'll see you again soon. (Happy now with the title, Mark?)

TimeWaster™

Speaking of Star Wars: Check out Vader Sessions, which combines video clips from A New Hope with audio from other James Earl Jones movies. Funny stuff! Beware, however: It features some bad words and a bit of Public Enemy's "Welcome to the Terrordome".

Today I'm listening to: The Ricky Gervais Show!